Some dramas leave indelible mark on your mind and just one of them is Dar Si Jati Hai Sila on aired by Hum TV. Honestly when I saw its bloopers before it was played; I was utterly disgusted. Yes! Because I was part of a society that believed in hushing down its standard taboos and pretending that they never existed in the first place.
Dar Si Jati Hai Sila is about the horrendous act of sexual harassment of mother-daughter in a joint family setup by the foster-brother of a paternal aunt. It talks about a number of issues like
- Physical abuse of a woman
- Helplessness of women in a joint family
- The lack of trust between husband and wife which allows outsiders to create rifts in the family fabric.
- The zero credibility given to narratives of women in a patriarchal setup where they think it is better to stay quiet than to speak against the perpetrators and answer absurd questions like
- Why did you not cover yourself enough?
- Why did you go out?
- Why you talked to a male?
- And then when you get logical answers of the above question they ask you the one final question…”WHY WERE YOU EVEN BORN IN THE FIRST PLACE? NA TUM PAIDA HOTI NA KOI MASLA HOTA BECAUSE WE CANNOT QUESTION A MAN. PERIOD.
I did not feel comfortable watching the drama or even its bloopers even with my mother-in-law leave alone male members of the family. The problem was not with the content but with the years of indoctrination that taboos like periods, sex, rape and abuse were not to be discussed overtly with anyone as it hurt the modesty of a woman.
My reaction was the same as was, of the majority of males and a large proportion of women; who think the problem lies with the woman and her dress and not the man who scans her to the sub-atomic level.
Anyways as I delved into the drama I realized that maintaining silence only helped the culprit in continuing the crime with added audacity. And this silence has to be broken; not only the abused or women but by the men as well.
If men do not speak up about abuse by their gender, a time will come when every man will be a Sikander for his daughter and every daughter will be a terrified Sila who is considered half-lunatic by her family.
Wake up before you end up in your grave thinking your daughter was safe in the confines of your house; while she was just another Sila.
Dar Si Jati Hai Sila is a must watch as it addresses one of the most rampant social ills of our hypocrite society.